We were played...

We will call this particular customer in the following story... PSYCHO

Psycho: There is water on the bathroom floor, I almost slipped, you should clean it up before someone gets hurt.
Me: Ok I will go mop it up right now.

....Well here's the thing, we got busy it was just banana and I on the floor and neither one of us could run to mop the floor.

One hour laterish.
Psycho: I am going to need a pack of ice for my swelling sprained ankle.
Me: Ok when your ready just let me know. (at this point I have no idea what she is talking about her sprained ankle, but I wasn't going to argue, whatever I will get her some ice.)

She then goes to another cashier and tells them that she slipped in the bathroom, twisted her ankle, and hit her head on the counter! Not what she told me before. At this point it was time to pull a manager into this, now we have an incident report to fill out. Banana talks to her, we had to take pictures of the bathroom (where there was no water, and she told Banana that I must have already cleaned it up...which I never did) her face, and her "swollen" ankle. We filed the proper paper work and everything was good.

Psycho then came back AGAIN claiming her head was killing her and she needed some aspirin. I said wait one min I will run to the back and see what we have. I then told Banana that she was back... We gave her a couple samples of aspirin that we had in out First Aid kit. BUT. While I went to the back to get all of this Psycho played us. She took one of out big thermos cups that are about $10. She took the sticker off and pretended it was hers! I didn't realize it. She was so odd... and she claimed that she had a PhD. whatever!!

I know this sounds terrible but I feel like I need to paint a pic for you in your head. Imagine a woman about 5ft 3, terrible hair (split ends and just a bad dye job) crooked teeth... I mean missing teeth. I guess she has a photo shoot in two days.... and her face is swelling from hitting it on the counter. So as you can imagine we are making sure that she can have water, pop, coffee, anything that she might need. But we did not give her that thermos. She then proceeded to tell me about how she owns her own business... she is an athlete recruiter, she recruits people like Matt Hasselbeck. Apparently she is expanding and I would be a perfect Administrative Assistant, so she wanted my number... Odd I know! So i gave it to her... well kinda, I might have flipped a few numbers around.

All in all, this Psycho lady who has a PhD, owns her own athlete business, and models on the side is getting kicked out of our store next time she comes in. We have proof of her on the cameras stealing the mug and she is out of there! YAY!!!

PS: Cowboy is back... no one knows what to do... so we are just not talking to him lol.
THIS IS MY 100TH POST!!!!!! I knew something exciting would happen!